About Life, This Week -2

Some of my favorite lyrics in the entire universe:

  I know someday you'll have a beautiful life

I know you'll be a star

in somebody else's sky

but why

why can't it be

can't it be mine

It's both the lyrics and the tune that gets me, every single time. Kudos if you know the group and even more so if you know the song title.

We are beach goers when most everybody else are non beach goers, usually between October to mid May. I love an uncrowded beach. My local beach doesn't allow dogs on the sand but we're perfectly happy walking the strand several times a week. 

There is a Dairy Queen at the end of the strand. That is enough motivation for me to walk four miles if I had to. 

The January blizzard of the month is birthday cake oreo. I know these things.

I know these things every month.

You gotta give love to get love.

Whenever I get into a disagreement with my husband, I have to consciously remind myself that whatever it is that I think I need, I need to give him that exact thing. 

Sometimes A lot of the times I just need him to listen. really listen. 

Sometimes I want him to agree that I need more scented wax so I share my scented wax with him. The reaction to this "gift" is similar to a cat owner finding a dead bird on their pillowcase with a heavier dose of confusion and a tad less horror. 

This past weekend, we had a heated disagreement that left us going to bed on not so great terms. Actually, I didn't go to bed at all. I cleaned the house like I was tweaked out of my mind on methamphetamine, finally crawling into bed at four in the morning to a blissfully slumbered hubby. Why I expected him to be tossing and turning, brooding over our argument and unable to sleep is a fantasy I continue to torture myself with. My husband would be able to sleep the night before his execution. 

Curtis and I are very careful with our words to each other when we are upset. We rarely ever say anything mean or hurtful. I have a hard time explaining to him that sometimes it's how we say things, even if it's not mean, that makes a difference. Tone can often be dismissive and abrasive. 

We worked it out the morning after but those hours in between were torturous for me. Nothing makes me feel more alone than when there's tension between me and the person who claims the spot at the epicenter of my heart.

I wonder if my marriage is on par with other marriages as far as disagreements and arguments go. Nobody really talks about this even though we all know it's normal to disagree and bicker with someone you spend so much of your life with. 

Maybe part of it is because it's sometimes awkward when people are candid about their marital fights or problems. It's hard to figure out what to say or what advice to give so we spare our friends this task. It could also be embarrassing, like our marriage is a meter of how successful we are and how well we keep our life together. 

One thing for sure is that there's nothing more awkward then being a bystander when a couple has a full blown yelling match in front of you.   

I once had to tell a police officer on the radio to "stand by, my computer just went down on me"

He told me to take my time.

I'm going to file that under Things I've Said That I Wish I Could Take Back.

((mom, please don't ask me what this means))

FANNIE!

Let's watch more sunsets this year.

WHAT I MELTED YESTERDAY:
     downstairs:
          kitchen : RG - butter brickle caramel ice cream pie *gift* & RG - french vanilla latte/ monster cookie / dunk my donut
          hallway : SMT - zucchini bread / caramel cookie latte / sticky marshmallow *gift*
     upstairs:
          bedroom : Tiffany Candles - blond moment / cotton candy frosting